It’s Halloween, and the land is overrun with shuffling, soulless, bloodsucking creatures who feed on the pure of heart while spreading pestilence and despair.
Of course, we’re not talking about zombies – we’re talking about lawyers. In fact, an entire army of lawyers being employed by Barack Hussein Obama to make sure that voters, living or dead, aren’t turned away at the polls. Unless, of course, they’re “typical white people” turned away by Eric Holder’s club-wielding friends in the New Black Panthers.
Perhaps in expectation of challenging the election results (and certainly with an eye towards facilitating voter fraud), Obama and his supporters are already shrieking about nonexistent voter suppression and Jim Crow laws – as if it takes some sort of conspiracy or campaign of fraud to unelect the worst president since the world was a cooling ball of gas.
Which is why liberal manatee Michael Moore and radically anti-American MoveOn.org have just released a pro-Obama video ad which flat out declares that the GOP is trying to steal this election and puts the words in the mouths of senior citizens (who, by the way, just lost $716 billion in Medicare payments under Obama).
In the ad, one elderly woman says that if this election gets stolen from Barack Obama, “we’re going to burn this motherfucker down.” And another elderly woman, speaking in her best negro dialect (as Harry Reid would say) says that if Mitt Romney wins, she’s going to give him “the world’s biggest cock-punch.”
So now that Obama has got young women promising him their virginity, and old folks promising to burn the country down and cock-punch Romney, how is he inspiring the rest of his voter base? He’s declaring that in his second term, he will focus on “communities of color” – specifically blacks and hispanics – because “that’s our future workforce and America will decline economically unless everybody is able to get the opportunities that they deserve.”
Unless they’re white, of course.
Or just maybe moldy green.